Thursday, October 15, 2009

Livin' the LIfe

So this semester is kicking my butt...but hey...that's what school's for right? Since my last post there hasn't been anything super new. Children of Eden is coming along very nicely. And so is Dancers' Company. We leave on our ten day tour on Friday! I am so stoked! I need a break from BYU. School that is...I LOVE being back here in provo though. :)

This is a video of the Dancers' Company performing at the dance devo! Pics to come soon!

Enjoy!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Won't forget, can't regret...

So, I just watched the film "Every Little Step" about the casting of the broadway revival of "A Chorus Line"...can I just say BRILLIANT! It was so powerful and moving, and I am so glad to be in the profession I am in. Now I just need to graduate so I can get out there.

I'm back at BYU now...trying to stay caught up with school and rehearsals, etc. I guess I'm losing weight again...so people have said...that is what modern dance will to do you. School's going pretty well so far. I am LOVING Dancers' Company. Everyone is so great and they have all been really supportive of me coming so late into the company. I wanted to show them my love for them, and so for World of Dance (which I unfortunately was not a part of), I attended every rehearsal and show with my pom poms I bought from the bookstore, cheering them on. They loved it, and I had a blast doing it (though I did get some funny looks...lol).

Children of Eden is also going swimmingly. Pat asked Brittany and I to be the dance captains, which is a great opportunity as well. The dancing is fun, our cast is SO talented, and I am loving the experience more and more.

Besides that, I am just trying to live life to the fullest, make new friends, try not to be a hermit, etc. haha But that is hard sometimes. Its Saturday night and ya know, I just stayed home by myself, ate some food, watched the game (GO BYU!), took a nap, and watched a movie. It was nice. But lonely too. I guess I would have much rather been with some other people, but that's ok. I'll survive.

Anyways, I just love life, even thought right now its not the easiest; it's definitely rewarding though. I'm learning so much and living.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

And the fun continues...

I"M BACK AT THE B Y OF U!!!! YAY!!!! I love being back so much. I got back from Jackson last Sunday and it has been such a whirlwind since then. Our last week in Jackson was a mixture of a lot of crap and a lot of fun. Its like eating junk food: so fun, yet you know its bad for you. haha We had to rehearse all day during the week with our replacements (we weren't paid for those rehearsals ps) and then have he energy to do the show and shoot out. And those weren't so bad, except that some of the replacements didn't have the greatest attitude, and there were some people with bad attitudes or trying to boss everyone around. No fun.

However, the shows were some of the most fun shows we did in Jackson. We also may or may not have had a minor war between the pink ladies and the t-birds...everything from stink bombs, to nasty smelling cologne, from stealing light bulbs or clothes from the dressing rooms, to Popcorn butter and WWJD signs. It was so fun! Overall, my summer in Jackson was super hard and crappy...and yet at the same time, so fun and fulfilling. I definitely learned a lot, both from good and bad experiences, and to be honest, I miss living amongst one of the most beautiful spots in the world...the TETONS!

Now I am back to reality, at BYU. So far, Children of Eden rehearsals have been way fun, and the members of the Dancers' Company are so supportive. I unfortunately am not in World of Dance, however, I am at all the tech the rehearsals with my pom poms cheering them on (literally).

And I just got called as an FHE dad. Great. I think God is trying to teach me something.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Grateful

I am SO Grateful for life right now! I had a Great time in Provo this weekend...seeing friends and reconnecting with them was great! I am SO excited for my classes. I am SO grateful to be in Children of Eden and Dancers' Company with so many WONDERFUL people. I am grateful for my family.

I'm moving on.

Thank you. :)


Thursday, August 20, 2009

Just Some Thoughts...

Isn't it interesting how the smallest thing can set off such a strong emotional reaction in us? A scent, a picture, a message, a word, a song. Our mind and our hearts are wonderful things, but also fickle at times.

I miss what I had, and I wish I could have it again. But I also have a vision of what I truly need and what should lie ahead in my future. A goal, if you will. But blast that one little picture, that message, or that song that send your heart and your mind off track of what you really want. Its always so hard to stay on the road to your goal. But hey, you can either throw in the towel, or use it to wipe off your sweat. You just have to keep on keepin' on, even if it means breaking your own heart sometimes. In the end, your goal is worth it.

And what is that goal? Happiness. Pure, simple, celestial happiness.

No one ever achieved that without a little hurt first.

Monday, August 17, 2009

This Video is AMAZING!

We are SO funny...ENJOY!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVBMBGJCy-s

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Friday, August 14, 2009

All I'm sayin' is...

I am gettin really bad at updating this thing. Sorry. I guess I have just been really busy and not on my comuputer as much. Which I guess is a good thing too.

A few things. This last week our girls did a wonderful musical revue written by Taylor and I called Backstage: The Musical. It was a great success! They all did so well! We had a blast with them and they were stars! This week is our last week of workshops (Thank goodness!). We have 10 little girls all under the age of 12. They are so cute. We are going to perform sleeping beauty at the end of the week.

This is also Meg's last shows with us. I am jealous that she gets to leave and go do DC. Wish I had said something. I would be MORE than happy to jet out of here and start rehearsals. Meg's replacement for Cha Cha is HILARIOUS...she is the real cha cha...like the grungy cafateria lady type girl that Cha Cha is supposed to be great. It will be different but good.

Tonight's show was funny. In the Beauty School Dropout reprise, I yank Frenchie into a dip right away...well...I yanked her...and we kept dipping, and down we went together! HAHA so I am like ON TOP of her singing to her....it was pretty funny. We just played it off...but it may or may not have looked like her Teen Angel was trying to rape her. HAHA

Well folks, that's all for now. More soon!

Monday, August 10, 2009

Its been a week or so...

So, my run as Danny Zuko ended last Wednesday.  It was a blast.  Especially the last little bit where I really felt more free to interpret the character in the way that felt much more comfortable to me.  It was SO much fun, and there is the possibility that I will be Danny Zuko again at the end of the run for a week or so.  

Other than that, things have just been busy as usual.  Our HSM kids group did well.  This week we have 8 girls, and Taylor and I wrote them a revue set in the girl's dressing room of a musical.  Its pretty funny, and we are doing some really fun songs in the show.  

This weekend was quite interesting.  It was really amazing, in both the good and the bad ways.  It was really fun, because really fun people came up to see us!  Cory, Micheal, Brittany, Micheal's cousin, and Gray came up, among others.  We had a lot of fun being tourists around town, sliding down the alpine slide, horseback riding, and LOTS of eating.  The not so fun part included certain people drinking in my house, not letting me sleep, and trying to take advantage of me.  NO FUN.  But that's all I'll say about that.  But OVERALL...it was a great weekend.  It was really good to have friends here to see me.  I was planing on going to Provo for the weekend, but that didn't work out.  Maybe in a week or so. 

Dancers' Company rehearsals started today.  Wish I was there.  I might one day.  We'll see.  

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Thank Goodness

So, I am so grateful right now for a few things.  

One, Steve Badgett.  He plays Vince Fontaine, and tonight was his last night with us.  He is such a brilliant actor, and I feel so grateful to have had the privilege of sharing the stage with him.  He is such a great example to me...not only on stage, but in his personal life.  I'm going to miss him and his family dearly.  

Second, I am grateful for Randy Boothe!  He came and saw the show this weekend, and he gave me some notes to help me improve my character as Danny.  And thanks goodness for those notes.  All of the notes he gave me were things that I have wanted to incorporate into my character, but I haven't been able to because the Director wanted something different, and my Sandy was still used to how the other Danny did things.  Well, thankfully Randy talked to both of them about what we thought should change, and they were willing to take a chance on me tonight.  I am so grateful they did, because I felt like tonight's show was amazing!   For the first time as Danny, I felt like I could just BE Danny and not have to walk pins and needles around certain people hoping that I didn't do something on stage that they wouldn't like.  Let's just say I almost cried last night when I got those notes; it was SO nice to have someone agree with me!  

And lastly, I am grateful to be alive.  I am grateful for my body, for my talents, for my friends, family, and loved ones.  I know there are still times I wish that God would have granted my prayers and allowed me to die on the mission so that I could just finish there and do a greater work, but I know my life has a purpose and a plan.  And though sometimes I lose track of that, I know that if I just do what I know is right, I will be happy!  

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Seize the Moment!

That was the phrase of today..."Seize the Moment"!!!  Granted, it was used in context of our show...and really seizing the moments that we are on stage...which btw, really helped my performance tonight...but it got me thinking...

We really need to seize every moment of our lives and live them to the fullest.  Yeah, we get tired...yeah, we get bruised...yeah, trials await us, but I don't wanna look back on my life an have regrets, or realize that I missed amazing opportunities to live and to grow. 

So I challenge you now, whoever you are, reading this...Seize every moment in your life...and live it to the fullest!  I know I am going to try to!  :)  

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Pics from Grease

Here are some pics from intermission yesterday...love the hair...right?!?!  HAHA
Me and Mallory...our WONDERFUL Pattie Simcox

Me and Meg...she's my Cha Cha and also my coworker for Playtime
The beautiful Savannah (Rizzo) and I
The incomperable Ben Medina (Sonny)
Yup.  It takes me like 20-30 minutes to do my hair...

Hope you enjoyed!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Oh Dear!

So, today has been a day of "Oh Dear's".  First of all, our kids in the workshop this week...well...let's just say they have A LOT of energy.  :)  Then, tonight for the show, I was fifteen minutes late to call, because I didn't wake up from my nap!  Then I got some notes before the show and they kinda threw me off the whole show, and it just wasn't my best.  :(

THEN...this is great...in the first act, during the park scene, I have a little confrontation with Sandy where she gets mad and storms off, and I am left to awkwardly approach everyone onstage who witnessed it and play it off cool.  So normally, we have bout 5 seconds of awkward silence before I play it off and say, "Wierd Chick!"  But instead, we had about three seconds of awkward silence, and the music for "We Go Together" came on.  Well, we thought the sound guy would fix his mistake and just stop the track...so we stood there VERY awkwardly for the first stanza of the intro.  Well, he didn't turn it off...so I yelled out "WIERD CHICK" over the music to everyone could react to it...and then we did the number!  OH MY AWKWARD!!! HAHAHAHA  We could not believe it was actually happening.  We were all laughing so hard in disbelief for the first two verses til about the bridge.  So we skipped about the last 5 minutes of Act I and just did that song.  HAHA

Then I just got a message from one of the mom's who put their child into the workshop.  Well, she thinks that the workshop is a little bit too much for him (he's turning 7 soon...so she took a chance putting him in).  So that leaves us (after having already lost about 3 of the kids orginally enrolled for the week) a whopping total of........*drumroll*......THREE KIDS!!  Yup.  Three girls...2 nine year-olds and one 11 year-old.  So now I have to not do Treasure Island, and I am concocting some sort of Little Girls of Broadway review.  OH DEAR!  

Wish me luck....

Today was the Day...

WOW!!  Today was definitely a day from...well...not from a good place to say the least!  It started out just being a really long day.  We put up our kid's workshop version of A Chorus Line today.  It actually turned out pretty well.  But getting it to that point was a bit...well...stressful would be an understatement.  I ended up having to do some revisions to the script and songs an hour before the show.  That was not fun.  Also, the dollar store lied to us and said they had top hats...they didn't.  So we had to scrounge what hats the theater had...including a few cowboy hats!  haha  Those were just a few of the stresses of that show.  But overall the kids did a great job and it turned out well. 

Meg and I with the Kids
The kids from A Chorus Line

Then we started our new week or workshops...Treasure Island.  We orginally had like 7 kids signed up, which is an ok amount, but now we are down for four randomly  :(  No fun.  And it seems like it is going to take them a while to learn things, 'cause they're a bit younger.  But hopefully that turns out.  I just editing our script for that...it was too long with too many characters.  So I made it work.  

Then I finally got to take a short nap, then I did the shoot out and the show.  It just made for a long day.  Not to mention that for some reason, people think that they can be rude and walk all over everyone and treat them like crap.  I don't know...there were just many instances all day where things didn't happen as planned, and Meg and I were YELLED at for them.  There was no polite talking to, no solution finding...just yelling.  It was really annoying.  

And I miss my friends.  I feel so disconnected and distant from them.  And I hate how it feels.  I feel like I've lost them.  So if you're reading this, please...let's not lose our friendship, k?

Monday, July 20, 2009

Snow King

So, I wasn't liking myself or my life.  So I decided to change some things.  I made some good goals, and so far so good.  One of my goals is to work out after the kid's workshop.  So today, I hiked Snow King mountain, and got a great bagel sandwich at Pearl Street Bagel.  So here are some pics!  

That is the Snow King Mountain!!!!

The fields were full of very pretty wildflowers! 

The view from the top!

Jackson's Hole from the top

Yup...I did it with my shirt off...I'm not the modest little
boy I used to be mom...HAHA

So yes.  A fun day.  After snow mountain, I floated down a somewhat lazy river in an innertube.  The creek runs next to our apartments.  I went with Meg and Bronwyn and some of the kids from the single's ward.  It was way fun. BUT (pun intended) I hit my butt on a rock...and I cut it pretty bad...I would upload a pic of it...but its my butt.  HAHA  



Sunday, July 19, 2009

Yay for Sunday

I love Sunday's.  They are just really great opportunities to reflect, meditate, and start over.  I am also very grateful for understanding friends who are always there to support me.  You know who you are.  So thanks!  And ps...the music to the youth broadcast A Brand New Year that the Church put out a while back is amazing.  So inspirational.  If you ever need a pick me up, that is the music to listen to!  

Oh, and by the way, I am now officially addicted Alias.  HAHAHA  I finished season one, and I loved it.  And now I am going to start season two.  If you didn't watch it when it was on TV, I really recommend that you start watching it online.  NOW!  

In other news, things have been just weird around here.  like vibe and energy wise.  I feel like the entire world is against me.  Maybe I'm just being self-absorbed or oversensitive, but that is how I have felt recently.  But I have also been trying to focus on others, and just loving them.  The show we are doing with our kids this week has really inspired me to focus on others and love them.  The message of the song What I Did For Love has really impacted how I am trying to live my life right now.  If you don't know the show or the song, I highly recommend that you get familiar with it.  :) 

Saturday, July 18, 2009

So, this is really getting...

Don't you hate it when you have a job, and your coworker does half as much as you do, and they get paid the same?  That is kinda how I am feeling.  I feel like she never prepares, etc.  I spend at least three nights a week staying up til 4 am or taking my afternoons to prepare scripts, music, or curriculum for our week, and all I expect is that she does SOMETHING in her own time to prepare...

 Like for example, this week we are working on A Chorus Line in our kid's workshop.  Because Meg is in charge of dance, I leave her free reign and I try to give her a lot of dances to do so that she feels like she is doing something.  But it is frustrating because she doesn't take time to research the show she is choreographing.  Instead, she just uses YouTube videos of the originals and copies the dances.  The worst part though, is that she doesn't even take the time before had to become familiar with the dances...she watches them and teaches them ON THE SPOT!  It is SO unprofessional.  

Anyways, just needed to vent that.  

Friday, July 17, 2009

Life is fun

So, things are going well here in Jackson!  I have been playing Danny now for about a week...It is going pretty well!  I feel much more relaxed into the role.  Jason Celaya (international pop star sensation...HAHA), our choreographer, came back to watch the show and he was very pleased with what I was doing!  He gave me some great notes that I have since implemented and things seem to be going well.  

This last week was really hard though.  There was too much drama happening behind the scenes...and I feel so disconnected sometime from everyone, from my family, and God.  So I have made the goal to get over myself and reconnect with those things.  

Our kids show last week went well.  I didn't much like the script and score to Sleeping Beauty (the show we performed), but the kids liked it and they did well.  This week we started A Chorus Line...and it is SO fun!  I LOVE that show!  Absolutely AMAZING!  It really inspired me today...it got me thinking about how lucky I am to have my body, to have the talents I have, and how I need to do everything in my life out of LOVE.  That is the answer folks.  Love.  

Anywho, life is sure fun sometimes, but you just have to keep on keepin' on.  ps...check this out...it is pretty neat!  http://the26project.org

Monday, July 13, 2009

Alias...

So, I started watching Alias the other day...from season 1 and now I am hooked.  HAHA  At least it gives me something to keep my mind occupied with.  

So, today is Monday.  I did the whole kids workshop this morning by myself.  It actually went much better than I thought.  But my voice is really tired.  I tried to use good technique as I projected, but alas, it still made my voice a little tired.  And tonight, the Single's Ward is coming to see our show for FHE!  And Jason Celaya, our Choreographer, is also coming tonight.  So I want to be good!  Ugh....wish me luck.  

Besides that, things are going well here.  There has been A LOT of drama here.  It just stinks.  It wares on you as time goes on.  And it just got back from a weekend trip to Utah.  HAHA 


Friday, July 10, 2009

SO much better!

Just wanted to update ya'll...tonight was SO much better than last night.  I really feel like i am relaxing into the role.  So yeah, that's all.  :)

Thursday, July 9, 2009

So...Danny Zuko's Gay...? Wait, WHAT?!?!

So, its been two days now of me being Danny.  Last night was Fabulous!  It went really really well, and I felt like I gave my all.  Overall, it was a great show.  The cast was super supportive and the audience was really receptive.  

But tonight was a little bit rough.  Overall the show was ok...but I just wasn't connected very well to the part.  I felt like the Hand Jive dance went really well, and so did Alone at the Drive In Movie, but the end of the show was a DISASTER.  First of all, during You're the One That I Want, during my verse I accidently sang, "You'd better shape up!  Cause I need a man...." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA  Oops!  So evidently Sandy wasn't the only one who had a "coming out"  during the show.  HAHA  And then I went down the stairs too fast and ended up tripping Sandy...overall, no fun.  

It will just get better I hope.  I'm kinda down right now about that and some other things...so I think I am just going to go to bed and never wake up...  :)


Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Ugh.

This process is so hard.  But so worth it I guess in the long run.  I am just getting so frustrated.  I need more patience with myself.  And I definitely need to stop hating myself right now...haha

Monday, July 6, 2009

Summer Lovin'

Well...here it is folks.  I start playing Danny Zuko in Grease at the Jackson Hole Playhouse starting Wednesday.  I had my FIRST rehearsal for it tonight.  Act One.  It went relatively well.  I really really REALLY need to work on being more grounded and "cool", and some other minor things.  The hardest part for me is NOT to look like a dancer.  So this will be a great learning experience for me.

The other hard thing for me is that I feel like the Director wants me to be Brock.  And I am not Brock.  I feel like the Danny that I am going to play is different from Brock's interpretation.  But alas, she is the director, and I must take the direction and make the connection.  So wish me luck!  

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Happy Fourth of July!



So today was fun.  We were in the Jackson Hole parade.  We all got in our costumes (me in my Teen Angel costume, a white tux  :)  )  And we rode in vintage Cadillac cars (that picture is of the car I rode in, except we had the top down!)!  So much fun.  We also had our music there, so as we got into town we were all out of the cars dancing in the streets!  The people LOVED us!  It was definitely fun.  PS....Dick Cheney like lives here...so he was at the parade...random.


Then we had a shortened kids workshop...once again, my coworker was NOT prepared..so I ended up stepping in and finishing some of the choreography.  :(  Then I took a short nap and we had an early show.  It went really well I felt.  After the show we all changed, and watched the fireworks from the roof of the playhouse!  It was so beautiful to see the mountains light up with the fireworks.  Definitely nice.  Then we cranked up the jukebox and had a sock-hop in the lobby of the theater with good ol' fried chicken, ribs, shredded BBQ pork sandwiches, potato salad, and of course red velvet cake!  

So, overall, a great fourth of July.  I wish I could have spent it with friends but oh well.  What can ya do? 


Saturday, July 4, 2009

Why do I do this to myself?

I am being so Negative Nancy today.  I think it might be a combo of many things, including the fact that I have gone to bed at 5 am the last two days, frustration with coworkers (see last post), people being disrespectful, especially when its directed toward me, my sunburn, the family reunion I am missing, and the fact that I have no friends here and all my friends are having a great time together in Provo, among other things.  

I hate feeling like this.  Something needs to change.  And it has to be me.  What I am going to change...I don't know.  But whatever it is, I need to figure it out, and fast.  


Friday, July 3, 2009

C'mon now!

Ok, really?  This is really getting...

Two nights in a row, I bust my butt til 5 am to be prepared for this.  I have slept a total of 6 hours in the last 60 hours of my life because I have been pulling the weight of this.  I give up my afternoons to do more publicity.  

And YOU have the AUDACITY to come in today UNPREPARED when you have known what you needed to get done, and you blame it on the video that wouldn't load?  Honestly.  Really?  

PULL YOUR WEIGHT!

Rant done.  :)

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Sunny Days...

So, lucky for Meg and I, we actually got three more kids signed up for our theater workshop this week...making 6 kids!!  We are also going to have some of our cast mates participate so that we can fill the roles and give the kids the opportunity to work with "professional" actors.  It should work out great! 

We also got to sit down with our boss and get all the info we needed out of her.  We got tons of names, places, things to do, and even a radio interview and newspaper ads out of her to help us advertise for our workshops to bring more people in!  It just feels good to have some direction in our efforts now.  

I got to sit out on the roof of the Playhouse today for about an hour and a half....just basking in the sun and beauty of jackson.  I may or may not have gotten a bit red...HAHA  but that usually turns to tan in a day or so...I LOVE MY SKIN!  

So, things are looking up!  Thank goodness I'm alive!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

This is really getting...

So, I have decided to stop complaining out loud to people because it gets really old after a while.  And instead I can vent on my blog!  haha  And people will actually WANT to read about it.  

So first, a quick update.  I finished my semester at BYU and got really good grades!  Unfortunately I also got mono and had to withdraw from a few classes.  But luckily I got better in time for Young Ambassador Tour.  YA tour was AMAZING!  I got to spend four wonderful weeks in Denmark, Norway, Sweden, and Finland performing, serving, and sightseeing.  It was an unforgettable experience!  If you want to see some photos feel free to go onto my facebook page and check them out!  Scandinavia is SO beautiful!  The people are beautiful and very friendly!  Surprisingly enough most of the people there speak English...so the Language barrier wasn't very prevalent.  Also,  we were so high north (at one point only 200 km from the Arctic Circle!) that it was ALWAYS light!  Like we would get out of shows and it would just be light outside, as if it were four in the afternoon.  So wierd.  HAHA  But overall I came closer to the Saviour as I testified of him in firesides and represented him and BYU in those four wonderful countries.  

NOW....I am in Jackson Hole, WY performing in Grease at the Jackson Hole Playhouse!  Its a fun show!  Come See It!  www.jhplahouse.com  for more info.  Anyways, the show itself is great...but it is the organization and management that have been driving me BONKERS!  Don't get me wrong...i LOVE everyone here...but things just need to run differently if they want to become better and really "Aim for the Heart" as the motto says this year.  

The main thing I a frustrated with right now is that I run the Summer Musical Theater workshops for kids.  Coming into this experience I thought that it would be like other workshops I have worked for...the Theater advertises and gets people to come and I do the work during the workshop.  Little did I know that I would be singlehandedly be handling ALL the aspects of the workshops...recruiting, advertising, etc.  It is NUTS!  First of all...I FEEL that that the price is WAY too much...I feel like I could get MUCH more participants at a lower price and make more money than have a few participants and make less money.  Second, this is my FIRST time doing ANYTHING like this...I have NO idea what I am doing and neither the theater or those who have done it in the past seem to help me AT ALL!  I know no one here...so I have no idea how to network or get around the word of mouth (which is the ONLY suggestion I have gotten from the theater of how to advertise).  I don't think I have a budget to advertise, and if I do, I have NO idea how much it is...though I doubt it is anything substantial.  So here I am in my living room.  I have called this list that they did give me off the top of their heads of people who have participated in the past TWO TIMES now...nothing.  And our second week of workshops starts tomorrow...I have THREE people signed up.  I can't do Hairspray with three people...I can do a DAMN good workshop and teach them about music, dancing, and acting, but I can't Follow through with what I promised to do.  And I feel like I have done ALL in my power to recruit.  So, we leave it up to fate.  I just talked to my co worker Meg, and we are going to express our concerns in a very professional and assertive way to our boss tomorrow and see what happens.  

Wish us luck!

Until next time!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Yeah....

So....once again I am going to attempt to update this blog somewhat normally....but alas...you know how it goes.  Things have been busy.  I have had a lot of shows lately with Young Ambassadors and we just finished the MDT showcase this weekend.  It was a blast!  

Besides that, I am just here alone on Valentines day.  Not my first choice, but I guess a necessary one.  It is hard, but its for the best.  I will probably spend the day in my pajamas eating my feelings or something.